I am in a bloody awful mood. In the past I have mentioned certain company that invites herself for dinner. She only ever calls when she is passing through town and wants dinner. She always shows up late. It’s almost 6:00 and she isn’t here yet. In my world you ask what time dinner will be and show up accordingly. She never offers to bring anything. Even if she did I would say no but it’s just fucking polite to say, what can we bring? She never helps with tidying up. Just fucking rude. This is the third holiday she has wanted to come for dinner. Once she invited herself on Christmas Day. Christmas. Day. Yeah, sure. We don’t talk to you ever but come to our house on Christmas Day and we will cancel all our plans with our family and wait all fucking day for you to show up whenever you want. Another time she invited herself on Thanksgiving. I have had enough. Next time she invites herself we will meet her at a restaurant. She is my husband’s ex sister-in-law (his estranged brother’s ex-wife) and my husband wants to see his niece or I would not be cooking dinner at all. The part that pisses me off the most is she flirts with my husband.

It doesn’t help that my shoulder has been really sore the last 2 days. My tolerance for dealing with assholes is low. It’s hard to be nice when in pain.

It’s Thanksgiving here in Canada. Happy Thanksgiving! Even though I am a grumpy bitch I am so grateful for all I have. I am very thankful for all of you.

Addendum. We were just discussing strategies for making sure she never invites herself again.

I could clean Norbert’s litterbox, not wash my hands and serve dinner.

My husband could pee in the kitchen sink.

I could sit on the kitchen counter and cut my toenails. Big thick big toe nails and leave them there.

What ideas do you have?

39 thoughts on “

  1. Do you have call display? Just don’t answer the phone. Or if you do, you have plans with your children. Or this one, “Oh we’d love to , but sorry we just can’t”. No explanation necessary. I guess she has no other loved ones, or she wouldn’t be asking to come on Christmas day. I’m sorry you are stuck with this. Happy Thanksgiving anyway! -Jenn

  2. Perhaps you could talk about how difficult it is to keep Norbert off the benchtops in the kitchen. So difficult you have given up trying. ‘But after all a few cat germs never killed anyone, right?’

    • Or I could just sit his litterbox right on top. “He’s such a funny cat. He won’t use the litterbox unless it’s up there. Isn’t he the cutest?”

      • Okay. You made me laugh for the first time today. Yes. He is a spreader. We have the litterbox in a little cubby because it goes everywhere. There is a mat outside his litterbox for catching all the excess that actually works.

  3. I am just thinking of you. I hate these kinds of people and certain ones you just can’t say “no” to because of the complicated relationships. Happy Thanksgiving dear woman. I am thankfull for you too.

  4. Yuch!! That sucks big time. I don’t like unexpected quests. It’s not in my nature. Therefore, I never call and invite myself. Rude.

  5. I would have a talk with David about it if this were happening in my family.
    You could make something and add a little too much salt to it every time she comes to get a free meal. That would eventually change her mind. Or, you could stay in that nasty mood just for her and say nasty things under your breath just loud enough for her to hear. I know I would.

  6. Uh huh. Different families can have very different ways of doing things. What’s unacceptable to you seems to be just fine with your husband and his family. Your husband “should” be putting you first, not the sister-in-law; your feelings, not the sister-in-law’s; I’d be pissed off too, especially if I had to do all the food prep and cleanup.

    I’ve come to the conclusion that another family’s way of doing things differently than my family is not WRONG. I’m just not comfortable with all of it, and that’s not wrong either, but women seem to pay a price if they don’t go along with other people’s expectations and desires. It sucks. You can’t win if you choose to do things YOUR way, and you feel like you lose when you always do things someone else’s way. I’ve yet to figure out what the win-win approach is.

    Your sister-in-law sounds insufferable. I’m thankful not to have any insufferable inlaws! That would be a serious pain. You do have to sometimes tell the truth straight out with people like your uninvited guest, and it can be pretty uncomfortable for everyone concerned. Been there, done that.

    Be sure to tell us what occurs in this ongoing saga!

    -Kate

    • We did that last Thanksgiving and Christmas. Next time she calls my husband can do the cooking and the cleaning and I will sit and do cross-stitch. I’m done.

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