Taking a Break From My Break

This  morning I was working and stopped to get gas.  It was in an area of town that is rather sketchy, across the road from a large homeless shelter and soup kitchen. As I was pumping gas a man was rummaging through the garbage bins looking for refundable soda cans.  He walked up to the bin closest to me and I said hello to him.  He saw this as an opening and this is the conversation that transpired. You can’t make this stuff up. 

Me – Good morning. 

Man – I am so mad at my son! He left me with this bag to carry and it’s heavy! (It was a black garbage bag.)

Me – Oh, that’s too bad. 

Man – Do you know what’s in it?

Me – No, what’s in it?

Man – A dead raccoon!

Me – Oh?

Man – Yes! 

He then went out unintelligibly about something that I could not quite understand about it being a female and how she is not going to be having anymore babies.  I was trying to figure out exactly how the raccoon came to be dead and why she ended up in a black garbage bag and why he was carrying it around but well, it was downtown and across from a homeless shelter and a soup kitchen. Lest you think me a horrible person it is an area that the police are having a lot of problems wth. It’s not safe. He, however looked harmless enough and there were people around so I wasn’t scared, just cautious. 

Me – Oh? 

Man – Yup.  I’m going to stuff her. 

Me – Pardon me?

Man – I’m going to stuff her!

He want on another unintelligible speech. I was still processing the fact he was packing a dead raccoon around in a black garbage bag. I could tell by looking at the bag that it was indeed a dead raccoon. At this point he had finished rummaging in the garbage bin. Me? I was baffled and speechless. He begins to walk away and bids me a good day.

Me – (in a weak voice) Bye. Have a good day. 

He then turns back to me and, 

Man – Do you know what I have in my backpack? 

Good lord. How do I get myself into these conversations? 

Me – No. What’s in your backpack?

Man – My dead wife’s death certificate!

Don’t ask if he killed her. Don’t ask if he killed her.

Me – Oh! Um, is that a good,thing or a bad thing?

Man – A good thing! I hated her. She stole half a million dollars from me! 

I don’t even remember what happened at this point. I just remember him walking away and looking in the garbage bin the next row over.  I should probably check my gas cap because I don’t remember putting it on. I just remember getting in my car and driving away and thinking that I definitely need to blog this one. 

18 thoughts on “Taking a Break From My Break

  1. Now that’s not what I came here expecting. What an experience. I can remember when there were no homeless people. I can remember the first time I saw a homeless person. It was in the 1980s. Now they’re everywhere.

  2. In answer to your comment ….. I wish I had taken pictures of every single ding dong room before I started last year. What a dumbass, I was. I honestly, didn’t think of it. I had NO IDEA so many changes were coming.

    Thanks for stopping by. I answered you there too, but wanted to make sure you got it.

    Cheers and boogie boogie.

  3. So nice to get to read a Birdie post, a what a post it is! All I can say is hhahahahahahahhahahahahah!

    PS: Did you remember to pay for the gas? šŸ™‚

  4. That’s one of the reasons why I don’t engage in talking to the homeless. Many of them are mentally ill and can be dangerous.

  5. Wow. You’re so right-can’t make that type of stuff up! I’m glad it was a (relatively) safe situation and that you didn’t get into anything scarier. The hubster gets irked with me when I go to stores in the bad parts of town. Some of the time I think he’s over dramatic, other days I can really see where he’s coming from!

Comments are closed.