It is one of those days. A day of darkness. Emotional and physical and spiritual darkness. It is a day of crying and wondering what the point is. A day where death and forever sleep looks so invitating. I know that depression is a liar but when you are under the mire you are still not able to breathe.
This particular episode came on so fast and has left me with no tools. I am completely bewildered. Usually I can feel the Black Dog of Depression in my neighbourhood but he seemed to come out of nowhere this time. He follows me around telling my that I am worthless and dying would be a sweet release. I don’t have the energy to make a doctor appointment never mind the energy to get there. And really, I don’t care. I’m just so tired. I have been crying for about 15 minutes and my husband is totally ignoring me. He doesn’t have the capacity to deal with me. Who would?
Sorry, readers. This is a blog about depression. I am not looking for attention. Writing is a release.