The 4th Annual Box of Resentments 

Or is it the 3rd? I don’t know. But it is time to start preparing for Winter Solstice.  Winter Solstice (December 21) is something I look forward to every year because it means the darkness is behind me and I can start looking forward to longer days. The long dark days do not make dealing with depression any easier. At best, it’s a drag, at worst it can be gruelling.  I usually just use an old Kleenex box but this year I went all out and spent $1.25 (Canadian) at the dollar store. That works out to about 8 cents in the US because our dollar is so bad right now. That could be my first resentment but I will let that one pass. What I usually put in there are real and true things I am sincerely pissed off at. Like my aunt who hasn’t spoken to me since my mom died. No idea why. I have sent her many emails, pictures and notes and nothing back. It makes me cranky which leads to resentment. (I actually think resentment is a funny word. My brother is a recovering alcoholic and we often laugh together about our resentments.) But actually, in real life, resentments just bog me down and cause me grief. I know for a fact my aunt spends zero time thinking or worrying that I have been hurt by her. So,  into the resentment box/Winter Solstice Box it goes. A Winter Solstice Box, rather than a Resentment Box makes me sound a lot more good and spiritual than I am. In reality I am just being pissy and cranky. I will burn the box on Winter Solstice. My husband and I went away last night to Gabriola Island. Oh, my heart! I love this place. It is an island full of hippies, environmentalists and people with a far left leaning. We stayed at a hotel that is almost 100 years old and made of logs. Today at breakfast our waiter was looking a little tired and it turns out he and his wife (who live in a 300 sq foot yurt that has three electrical outlets, I am not kidding) just had a baby two weeks ago and he is sleeped deprived. I wish I would have asked him if it was a home birth with a midwife because I would have bet money on it. The island actully had a midwife store. How awesome is that?

Our dinner last night was especially cool. Our waiter, in all his fabulousness, wore purple pants and shirt with a red cardigan and bow tie. I wanted to take a picture but I think he was a little shy. The business is owned by a man who works there with his husband and best friend. The food was so, so good. Pork schnitzel. I could eat pork schnitzel everyday for at least a month before I needed a break. (Goodbye 20 pounds lost.)  The my husband and I shared a berry cheesecake. I also had a Guinness but couldn’t finish it because alcohol gives me hot flashes. When we left I got all emotional. First, I love the island so much and it is a real possibility that I may live there one day. But also, that I live in a place that man can introduce himself as “my husband and I”.  Grateful. Grateful. Grateful.

We are going away tomorrow to another community an hour away.  My job comes with so much stress and these breaks are so needed. Now that I am finally out of debt I’m hoping they will happen more often. It sure makes a difference with my kids out of and leaving the house. I never realized before just how much of my pay cheque they were taking.  In January, I will actually start saving towards retirement. A bit late to start at almost 46 but I am ahead of so many. I am grateful that my employer pays into a pension for me. I will be able to retire at 71. Ag! I hope not. Sooner than that I hope

Ok, lovelies. I am going to leave it at that. Still no purple hair pictures because now it needs to be washed. Tomorrow maybe. And just so you know. I love you all. Truly. I thank you for being part of my silly little life. Much love. Namaste.  🙏

Here are some pictures.


13 thoughts on “The 4th Annual Box of Resentments 

  1. A hundred year old log built hotel sounds rather cool! I’m glad you are getting some breaks. I love the idea of your winter solstice box. I burned some photographs in my backyard with my husband once. It helped a bit, but more help came later. Great attitude, Birdie! -Jenn (Also wanted to thank you so much for coming to my blog and commenting. It is so nice to have “regulars”).

  2. That sounds absolutely WONDERFUL. I am so glad that you got your much needed break. I resent that no man here can introduce his husband (or woman her wife). Resent it so much.
    And I love your idea of a resentment box burning. And may have to follow suit.
    Hugs.

    • Oh I love this post. I love idea of the winter solstice box, and your little get away location…and that you recognize how needed breaks are when we do the kind of work that we do. You know that my “dream” is for my husband I to retire to a yurt. Maybe 2 connected by a hallway….one for sleeping and one for later living. I don’t see he and I living in 300 sq feet and not killing each other, though we do adore each other. Lol

  3. Your Gabriola Island sounds like a lighthearted place. It’s important to have a place like that to visit.

    My grandson was born on the winter solstice. I’ve always thought it was a good sign. Winter blues are a real thing, I know. My D-I-L has a problem with it, too.

    Congrats on getting out of debt. That is not a small thing. It makes it easier to sleep at night.

  4. What a great getaway! And my kind of place. I am a ‘tree hugger’, so I would fit right in. I love your idea of a winter solstice box. I should consider doing this, although I think mine would be filled with pet peeves or annoyances; stupid shit that people do that get on my nerves 🙂

  5. That place sounds just heavenly. It’s a good idea to have these breaks away. That’s something we need to do more of to keep our energy levels up whe working so hard. I might do a solstice box this years I’ve always liked yours. Leaving the darkness behind sounds good to me,

  6. What a fabulous graveyard! You don’t see many like that anymore. My grandparents used to court at a graveyard because it was so pretty and quiet. They’d take a picnic and a blanket and just enjoy themselves. True story. That last sentence..blanket and enjoy…that is not what I meant !
    Anyway, sounds wonderful , all of it. I’m going to go make a box of resentments right now. I will be using a moving crate to hold them all….but boy will it be fun to see it go up in flames!!

    I am grateful for you this Thanksgiving, Birdie.

  7. I’ve never been to Gabriola Island, sounds lovely. I think the furthest north of been on those islands is Galiano Island. That’s how I spent my first honeymoon, sailing around the golf islands. I’m hoping to retire in five years, fingers crossed. I’m finding the deaths getting to me. I care about my patients and even have favorites. It hurts when they get worse and die.

  8. Someone sounds happy! I’m on short break with my partner at the moment. It’s good to get away, even though I know all the crap will still be there when I get back.

  9. My dad was just saying something about looking forward to the 21st!

    You getaway sounds amazing. I love those beautiful places that make our souls sing.

    Much love and gratitude right back :o) Glad you’re in my blogoverse!

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