I am in one of my moods. Is it PMS? Peri-menopause hormones? Life? I don’t have any idea but I am in a foul mood. Everything is pissing me off and I just want to be left alone but that isn’t going to happen. Right now I have a list of things that are pissing me off.

  • Stephen Harper. Our piece of shit Prime Minister and his scuzzy cabinet. (Think Donald Trump with nicer hair but just as evil.)
  • The mental and the emotional energy it takes to just get though the day. And it makes me even more pissed off that I know I am only having First World Problems and that I should just be grateful. The world is turning to shit and there is nothing anyone can do about it because we are way passed fucked and nobody has the energy. Elizabeth posted today about rewriting your story but what if you can barely get out of bed in the morning?  And when you do try to rewrite your story and open a Word document your computer does a fucking update and you have to wait. (Yes, I am speaking allegorically.)
  • Pain in my neck and back from falling over a month ago. It is a W0rks@fe issue so I can’t really talk about it but I can tell you I am well within my rights to press this further if I have to. I was made to work in a place that I had reported to be unsafe three separate times. For the first time in my life I understand what “pain and suffering” means. Just going to physio brings me close to tears because it is so painful.

Or maybe it is just that time of the year again. It has been 4 years on the 27th since my mom died. The light on our kitchen shines a certain way this time of year and it reminds me of the days when she was getting ready to die. I have to purposely turn different lights on in the house so I don’t have to see the shadows.

I will go to bed now. Maybe I will wake up in a better mood. It is a good night for Ativan.

17 thoughts on “

  1. I’m sorry you feel so upset Birdie…July is a bad month for me for the same reason and my relationship with my mother is complicated, to say the least…I do hope your sleep is restful and helps you feel a bit better.

  2. I find that light brings back memories for me too, as does time of year.

    I agree with you about Harper completely. Scary man. Take care woman and hope the pain passes soon. Sending hugs.

  3. It’s the season. I don’t even want to talk about my moods lately!
    I hope your body feels better soon.
    Life is hard.

  4. Dear Birdie, I am so sorry you are feeling like this. I couldn’t help but laugh when you mentioned Donald Trump, because just the other day I posted an image of a guinea pig and the caption was that Donald Trump’s hair had finally gone on vacation. Something like that…I found it funny, anyway. Take care of yourself, sweet Birdie. Sending you much love and many hugs. 🙂

  5. Our awful PM is enough reason to to be in a foul mood, I’m sorry you have your own sorrows on top of it. I do feel like yesterday was a really bad day for almost everyone and I have no clue why. I hope today is better for you

  6. I hope that when you read this you will have slept well and feel rested and ready to gird your loins for a brighter day.

  7. So sorry you are not feeling well. I hope it improves soon. Physical therapy often helps, but it takes a while. I hop it works quickly for you.

  8. Dear Birdie, I hope today dawned brighter for you. I so understand what you mean about the light in the house. You will always miss your mom and she will always be with you. Both. Sending love.

  9. I left you a comment earlier but i was on my phone and it seems to have disappeared. I was saying that I hope you feel a little better now, and that I know about that quality of light, and you will always miss you mom, and she will always be with you. Both. Sending love.

  10. I’m replying to this post on the 27th because I was drawn to visit your blog today and to catch up after some weeks of overwhelm. I’m glad I did. It’s your Mum’s anniversary today. Thinking of you and your Mum. Sending you hugs.

Comments are closed.