I Wonder

I wonder if I knew what caused my downward mood spirals if I would be able to do anything about it. I should be starting my period in a few days. Or maybe it is lack of sleep. Or maybe it is thinking that I will never actually become and Licensed Practical Nurse because I have a severe learning disability in math and won’t likely be able to get the pre-requisite or maybe it is even if I do get the math under my belt is having no idea where the money is going going to come from. (The course is $18, 000.) Or maybe it is the moon or the air or the flow of the ocean. Or maybe it was a small curt comment made by someone that just annoyed me that I knew wasn’t true but when I denied the accusation that accuser just used it tofurther prove a point. You know the, “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.” Or maybe it is a bit of everything. I will go to bed early tonight and try not to get caught up in the “shit I have to do before bedtime”.

Some good news.

“An institutional dispute between the Supreme Court of Canada and the Conservative government reached a new plateau on Thursday after the court said medical-marijuana users have the right to consume the drug in ways other than smoking – such as cookies, lip balm or lozenges.*source

Which means that it will be available to everyone who needs it. We are moving forward in some aspects.

11 thoughts on “I Wonder

  1. Birdie, it may help if you keep a personal journal for yourself where you write down what you eat each day and the events of your day…this may help you to better pinpoint what contributes to your down feelings. It can’t hurt, at least. 🙂

  2. Okay, you already know you’re an HSP and being hormonal, tired and having people say unfounded things doesn’t help…Don’t get down on yourself for your feelings, just know they will pass and go take a bath or shower and try to get to bed so you can have some energy tomorrow…Hugs! Our state failed to pass the medical marijuana thing despite the fact that most people want it—a stupid technicality but I think a lot of people here are plain stupid. Medical marijuana is necessary for some folks because big pharma doesn’t work, but rather than look at the research, they care more about what politicians say which is always suspect…Hell, we can’t even manage decent healthcare anymore.

  3. Sometimes I think our moods plummet for inexplicable reasons. Just the same, you always have too much on your plate. Too much for superwoman, and much too much for one overtired, overworked sensitive soul.
    Be as kind to yourself as you are to others. Please.

  4. I think moods are like waves in the ocean. They come and go and don’t always stay up long or maybe that was erections? Either way it works for both. You may be lapping the shore right now but soon you’ll be back riding high.

  5. When I get depressed it’s often for a reason but it takes me awhile to figure out the reason. Once I understand what’s bugging me and I have a good night’s sleep, I usually feel better. Not always but often. I think of my depression now as a warning system that I need to look deeper at something, or accept something that I don’t want to accept. I’m really good at not accepting “what is”. Fatigue and hunger always make things worse for me. This past Monday I spent much of the day crying off and on, at work! I figured out what was bothering me and had a very long sleep and felt better.

    You have a lot on your plate, work, school and worrying about biopsy results. Sending hugs.

  6. It seems to me that the Supreme Court of Canada’s decision was just simple common sense. Good thing the SCC is looking out for Canadians’ best interests because the Harper Government sure as hell isn’t.

  7. Sometimes I think my moods are like the tides and I have no idea what moon is pulling them. Too many factors to make sense of.
    Sigh.
    I wish there were better answers.

  8. It’s so annoying when people do that. I had no idea that it costs so much to get an LPN. Don’t give up. I think you’ll be very good at it.

  9. Birdie: Forgive me for posting off-topic, but when my old computer died, I lost your email. Mine is attached to this comment. I was in Wally World the other day and saw that The Bullet has a machine that takes frozen fruit and turns it into ice cream.

    No idea if it works but wanted to let you know, in case you haven’t seen it.

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