One More Day Done

I am just glad that this particular day is over. Yesterday I mentioned that my step-daughter was staying with us because last week she decided out of the blue that she was moving to Calgary. My intuition, that is not often wrong, told me that she got kicked off welfare in BC so she decided to move to Alberta. I didn’t mention that I was also very sure a man was involved. Why? I don’t know. I just felt it. Today my intuition was backed up by some evidence. Remember last night I said that she was in the bathroom for over 2 hours? Well she was in the bathroom again this morning for 2 1/2 hours. She was supposed to be getting ready to catch a plane.  Her dad, my husband, was having a fit because he knew if she didn’t hurry she was going to miss her plane. Guess what? She did. She missed her fucking flight. And now I am more than pissed at my husband because not only had he paid for the first flight that she missed but he was left to pay for the second flight as well. I don’t know who I am more angry at. Her, for this sense of entitlement that the plane would wait for her (she apparently had a hissy fit at the airport) or my husband for bailing her out again and enabling her again. She is 28 years old for fuck’s sake! Anyway, the reason I think she is meeting a man in Calgary is because she spent 2 1/2 hours getting ready doing her hair and makeup to catch a plane. She said she was being picked up by a woman’s shelter in Calgary. I call bullshit. You don’t spend the night colouring your hair (I found out later that is what she was doing) and putting on press on nails and dressing in a mini skirt to meet someone from a woman’s shelter. Anyway, like I said last night I can’t do anything about it.

I feel melancholy tonight. I am worried about this breast biopsy tomorrow. Today I stayed home from work because I am so anxious. It isn’t just the biopsy or my step daughter. It is just a sense of doom. Even the weather seems to have picked up on my mood. It has gone from warm and sunny to cool and dark. Even that asshole starlings have quieted down for a bit. I hate this feeling. This feeling that something very bad is going to happen. Is it normal to be worried that this biopsy is going to become a diagnosis of the dreaded C word. Do other people deal with this kind of thing differently?

BlueberryCheesecakeI think the best thing for me is to just got to bed. And have some Chapman’s Blueberry Cheesecake ice cream.

12 thoughts on “One More Day Done

  1. Wishing you the best, tomorrow. I am following another blogger, she has cancer now twice. I can’t link to her fro here, but her blog is just eat your cupcake. You might enjoy her diary-like posts. I do.

    As for the 28 year old, wow. Sorry your hubby lets her get away with so much, but it sounds like she has trained him, well. Shame.

  2. Of course it is normal to worry. Most of us, including me, are really, really good at focusing on possible negatives. Good luck. I am sending positive thoughts by the bucket load.
    The Happy Whisk is right about your step daughter training your husband. Sigh And I would say you nailed it about the man. Dress up for a refuge? I don’t think so.

  3. I echo what Happy Whisk is saying and also follow Just Eat Your Cupcake. I am hopeful that your biopsy will not have the dreaded results you predict…Fingers crossed for you. As for your stepdaughter, I am sorry she has not yet grown up…Whatever would she do without her daddy, I wonder?

    I know it sounds trite, but try to relax, eat some ice cream…I once had a large bowl of that in a warm bath with bubbles, back in the day, and found them both soothing. I will be thinking of you tomorrow. Must now rest my hand.

  4. Oh, dear. I am sending you all my healing thoughts for your anxiety, for the test tomorrow and for all the aggravations of family. You have lots of friends out here in the internets, and I imagine I speak for many when I say that we are all anxious when we are uncertain about health issues. We are all pulling for you, too!

  5. You are not alone Birdie in feeling anxious, I am exactly the same, I often assume the worse, sometimes I am wrong. I’ll be thinking of you later today. x

    • Yep. Thinking about you here and yes, it is quite normal to be worried about a biopsy. Who wouldn’t be? You have a lot on your plate.
      Your step-daughter is not helping. And no, she was not going to go meet a woman from a shelter. You don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure that out.

  6. Thinking of you today. Moment by moment the wait will pass and you will know what’s going on.

    The step daughter sounds like a lot of her generation. Many of them seem to feel that they are entitled to everything just because they want things. My foster sister lived with our mom until her 30’s and didn’t even move out after she got married. Her husband lived with his mom. Blew my mind every time I thought of it. Xx

  7. It is completely normal to worry, Birdie, and going to bed seemed a good solution. Don’t be mad at your husband. If he hadn’t paid for the second ticket your step daughter would be stuck on your doorstep. Maybe he calculated the lesser of two hard situations. I hope things go well today.

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