Why I Will Never be President

I will never be president because I am not American but that is not my point. My point is I don’t always do a great job of problem solving. For instance…

This morning I pulled out my rarely used Sony e-reader. I plugged it into my computer and downloaded a book from Amazon. No, the point of this story is not about Amazon and Sony e-readers not being compatible. That is true but that is not the point of my story. The point of this story is about charging. My reader was charging fine when it was plugged using a USB port. My laptop overheats so I decided to use the wall charger. I plugged it in. Nothing. I unplugged it and unplugged it again. Nothing. I unplugged it, blew on it (because that is what we humans are genetically programmed to do) and plugged it back it. Nothing. I unplugged it and used the USB port again. It started charging. I unplugged that and then plugged the wall charger back in. Do you see where this is going, Those of you who could be president will have figured this out right away. Not the case of this non-president. Now I am confused. I know the charger works because I use it for my GPS. It works! Maybe the e reader is getting old. No, the USB port works. So I Google it, rather I Duck Duck Go it because I don’t like that Google tracks me. So I Duck Duck Go it and none of the suggestions work. Whhhhhhhhhat? I give up. I plug back the reader into the USB port and charge it that way. I get up to get a glass of wine. No, I could have but I didn’t. I got up and realized that the wall charger was not plugged in. I want the last 20 minutes of my life back. But that is the reason I will never be president. 

2014-09-03 12.05.47-2

See the goose on the right? It has a band around its neck. I guess the poor thing had been injured. This situation is another reason why I could never lead a country. I feel sorry for the goose. I worry. I worry that maybe the other geese make fun of her. Maybe she has trouble finding a partner. Do geese think about this sort of thing? Do regular people think about this sort of thing or is it just people who will never be a world leader. 

Today, even though it is still sunny I pulled out my SAD lamp. Seasonal Affective Disorder be damned! I will not let the rain and darkness get me any more depressed than I already am.

Today I did something remarkable. I canceled my my cell phone. Enough is enough. If you want to get a hold of me you bloody well can wait until I get home. And I might even wait a day or so before I call you back. (Emergencies not included in this tirade.) The world is entirely too plugged in. E mail, Skype, Twitter, instant messaging, cell phone… I have had enough. 


14 thoughts on “Why I Will Never be President

  1. You seem kind so sassy today, I love it!!!
    The more “connected” we are, the less connected we are. Hence my hatred of Facebook. I didn’t get a house phone when we moved here, you’d be amazed by how little my cell phone rings. It blows my mind.

  2. I like my cell phone, I can text my grown children and not bother them with calls at a bad time, and it has a wonderful camera I can use to take photos for my blog. I keep the ringer turned off on my home phone so I don’t have to be bothered by solicitor calls, but if there is a power outage I can make emergency calls. When I feel depressed I listen to my praise and worship music, or the Christian radio station, KLove. God always ministers to me best through music.

  3. I would worry about the goose, so I’m not going to be a world leader either. Unless the geese make me one in their group because I care about them 🙂

    Yes, the world is totally plugged in (she says as she types a comment on a blog). At least I don’t text…yet. I have an antique cell phone (probably older than my daughter) that I never use and about five people have the number. It rings about once a month. Ringing twice makes it a very busy month. Like you, people have to call my home to speak to me. And if I’m not home, they leave a message. When I leave my home, I am totally disconnected from the online/phone world. And it’s so nice!

  4. OH, I would have gotten up and had that glass of wine. And another one after that. 😉
    Unplugged is good!! Well, obviously, I’m at the blogs typing away…but no music or t.v. or phones are going. It’s nice, actually. I might even make it to the sun porch today and read a chapter or two of a real book!

  5. But that’s exactly why you would most certainly make an excellent president. If your name started with GB or GWB you would be the perfect candidate. Of course, being a caring person is not really a prerequisite for the presidency but you could always hid that trait.

  6. We are indeed too plugged in.. well except for the chargers. 😉 You so made me laugh with that. And I could never be a leader either.. because that hadn’t even occurred to me. I know that one of my chargers works for some devices but not others and I had assumed that was the issue.

  7. I left my phone at home today by accident and it was LOVELY. But I have no home phone. So I’m kind of stuck, unless I become a hermit, which is becoming increasingly tempting.

    Hope the dog stays at bay.

  8. Not sure the President is a great problem solver either. Wow.. got rid of the phone. good for you. I’m slightly addicted to mine. not good!

Comments are closed.